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Fighting, arguing or having spirited discussions are all part of our relationships and in order for us to have meaningful relationships, we have to have these discussions but ... it is very easy once we become involved in one of these discussions to get amped up and say things that take away from the goal of getting to a point of resolution. I've been there, as we all have ... the more you listen or talk, the angrier you become and then as if I were a spewing volcano, it unleashes ... those statements that I tried to recover and put back in my mouth, but they are out and the damage is done!
As I said, we have all been there, done that I know now what. Let me first start with a bible verse. It doesn't matter if you are a Christian, atheist, Muslim or anything else. The fact of thematter is that The Bible IS wisdom literature. I happen to believe it to be the inspired word of God but, don't let that distract you. The verse is this: "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, Ephesians 4:25 -27. For Kris and I, we have found that this verse has been a great motivation to work toward not allowing our anger and frustration to go unresolved and consequently allowing it to fester into .resentment. One other foundational thing I want to share with you which will help you in resolving conflict is this: the first words in the book: "The Purpose Driven Life" by Pastor Rick Warren are: "It's not about you." Think about those words. I don't know about you but for me, when I am angry at Kris or anyone else for that matter, there may be somevalidity to my anger; she forgot to pick me up from work; she forgot to meet me for lunch or she forgot to pay a bill. But the real issue causing my anger to go where it goes is my mindset that it IS all about me! In other words, how her mistake affected me, and how important I am or how busy I am. .. how dare she waste my time ... like I am God or someone!
The last foundational thing I want to share with you is this; we cannot change anyone! Now, I sense some disagreement on your part so I will say it again; you cannot change anyone! Oh, we can exert our influence, but it is their decision to react however they are going to react. For us to buy into the idea that we are going to change anyone is to subscribe to the lie that if they would only change then things would be better. Whata convenient way for us to take the spotlight off of ourselves and our faults! The real issue I have found is changing myself. That is the only person on the planet that I have the control over (sometimes) to change and besides, I have found that when I do change my behavior on a certain issue ... others around me change the way they treat me ... hmm ... funny ... huh?!
Now, let's move into some tips about "fighting fair" ... resolving conflict without further inflaming the situation and ... actually getting to a resolution of your issue. Ready? Here we go! Here are some rules for a fair fight ...I don't want to see any of this or this or that ...:
Name calling ... if you really want things to go south on you, call your mate to name ... idiot will do the job nicely! It really doesn't matter ifyou really believe in your heart that this person truly is a slacker or a right-winger, left winger or anything else. Bringing attention to it during conflict does not serve to get you closer to your goal of resolving things. It actually diverts you away from that goal and takes you down a whole other rabbit trail. You will eventually have to return to the path of resolution at some point, now, with all the baggage you picked up on the rabbit trail, so why not just stay on the resolution path?!
Cussing or excessive use of adjectives ... these only serves to Tristeza y conmoción … the disagreement. Think on these two statements: "It really makes me feel like you don't value me when you forget to meet me for lunch" or "It really makes me feel like you don't blankety blank value blankety me when youblank forget to meet me for lunch". I don't know about you but for me, the first statement is going to sting and cause me to think before I speak. But the second statement?! That is going to get me to thinking about an "OH Yeah?!" scenario where I am looking for a statement to top it...and away we go!
Use of Absolutes...can derail a discussion as easily as anything. When anyone says to us you "always" or you "never", again, I can feel the little hairs on the back of my neck standing up and it gets that "Oh Yeah?!" thing going again. First of all, the statement is incorrect. We as humans are not perfect machines and could not always or never do anything...I don't care what it is. The use of absolutes gives the conflict an element of absurdity that anyone will want to argue and defend ... its easy and fair game.
Talking about family members ... is another sure way to send your conflict resolution off on another rabbit trail. Yeah, your uncle is a goofball! I can talk all day about the faults of my family members but the minute Kris agrees with me or a disparaging remark about initiates one of my family members ... game over! My tendency is to defend them (although I may know that my uncle is a goofball in my heart of hearts) and now I am far from thinking about the sun not going down on my anger ... if it does ... too bad ... its her fault now!
Conflict Resolution:
So how do you resolve a conflict? This is basically the model Kris and I have worked through and taught to a lot of people and it really works. Like anything else, though, you may want tofollow this right down the list the first time or two. But, we are not you and you will need to morph, or adapt this model to who you are and what works in your relationship. Here it is:
Cool off period ... this doesn't mean go home to mom for 6 weeks. By a cooling off period is go for a walk or a drive for a while. For us, we have found that it is very helpful to be in prayer and meditation during this time. Not just prayer for God to change your mate but honestly, to show you what your part in this conflict is ... how you have added to it. But also just to get yourself beyond that point of being so mad that you truly cannot control what you say or do. You are no good to your mate in this condition. Take whatever time you need to get there. Now, this is not to say wait until you areno longer upset by the conflict ... that would be a long wait! You will still be upset when you get back together but in more control of your actions and emotions.
Sit facing each other ... focus, this is important. This sounds goofy but for the first time or two just try it. You will find that you will be less distracted (though sometimes we would like to be distracted so we wouldn't have to deal with the situation!) and your discussion will be more productive.
Pray Together ... this can be a tough step. If you can overcome your anger enough, hold hands and pray together for each of you to see your part in the conflict and to take responsibility. Give the conflict to Him to work out that is His job. Yours is to listen and follow His directions!
State the Problem ...Each of youstate the problem as you see it. No interrupting now! You will each get your turn! This will also help to clear up any misunderstandings.
State your Contribution ...Each of you state what you feel your part in the conflict is. State the Resolution ...Each of you state what you feel needs to happen for this situation to be resolved. Remember to stay focused on yourself primarily and what you can do to resolve the situation.
Work toward Resolution.Not every conflict will be able to be fully resolved. First, I want to walk you through the different levels of conflict resolution: First is Acquiescence. This is when one of you basically just gives up and says, "Whatever." "I'll just go with whatever you want to do". Translation: I am giving up my position on this and shifting itentirely to you and may or may not continue to be angry with you ... silently. With Acquiescence, the party acquiescing is usually not happy with the outcome and may not feel free to continue to discuss the issue. In this case, the issue is not resolved and will probably come up again ... and again ... and again. The next stage is compromised. This is when you each give something up. It is better than acquiescence but not as good as full resolution. Rather than a win, compromising is actually lose, lose, because you each gave something up. The last form of conflict resolution is actually resolution. Resolution is when you both agree. One aspect of moving from compromise to resolution is to adjust your expectations ... if the outcome you are looking for changes, then compromise may not benecessary and you will be able to resolve. Try to move from conflict to either a compromise or resolution.
Pray ...Pray together thanking God for helping resolve your conflict and also ask Him to heal your hurt and help you to stay resolved to making the necessary changes in yourself.
Get on with Life!
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Often we think of residual marketing strategies as the sale of products that are used up and purchased. But what if ... Residual Marketing Strategies included visiters to the community who keep coming back?
There are many ways of accomplishing the "come back" scenario.
Return Visitors to the family Home
As long As Grandma and Grandpa live there, the kids will keep on coming back home to visit. Small towns across America send off their college age youth hoping they'll return, and when they don't, resigning themselves to the idea that they'll come home to see Grandma and Grandpa. Do they? Sometimes they do, but more often, Grandma and Grandpa eventually retire where the kids are. This process only works as long as Grandma and Grandpa are required to remainemployeed at their local jobs. Once that's done, Grandma and Grandpa do the traveling.
Let's face it folks. We're running out of Grandma and Grandpa's who live in Hometown America. baby Boomers prefer Florida and Arizona if they retire. If not, they're moving closer to the kids in order to take care of the grandkids while mommy and Daddy work. It's a sign of the current economy.
Loser Regroup and Set Off Again
When Little Johnny loses his high-paying job and needs somewhere to lick his wounds and regroup, he goes home. Trust me, he isn't buying collectible arts and crafts, he's saving up for his next exit. Working at the local convenience store isn't going to pay him well enough to ship hiim out again, if he's spending his hard earned dollars on Granny Turner's WicketWocket Coddler, instead, he'll go visit Granny and she'll make him one for free. If his wife dumped him for the Executive on the Third Floor, he's probably busier trying to figure out how to catch Little Bonnie Blue eyes than he is at trying to improve the economy. Either way, he isn't here to frequent the local markets.
We Came Back to Raise the Kids
This pocket of folks have a die hard attitude about what they're going to do on Saturday afternoon. Guaranteed, they'll be at the ball park, roasting dogs and marshmallows on the tailgate with not a single clue what's happening on main street. Not only do they not have any interest in Main Street USA, but they aren't interested in who's entertaining who in the local shopping centers. They travel to BEASTY Market Discount Centerand buy everything in mass quantity to feed that brood of children that surrounds ' them everywhere they go.
As for Entertainment? Little Suzie throws cheerios at Little Billy and he puts Gum in her hair. Who needs entertainment with all that happening?
Residual Marketing Return Factor
Dynamo retailers on Main Street USA recognize the value of drawing in niche markets and bringing them back with quality product, friendly service, and whole spectrum business centers. These community criers attract buying customers with a wealth of variables. Good food, high quality products and service, investment arts, hobby and craft options, entertainment and resort style activity centers welcome them in and draw them back.
If they come back a second time and someone rememberstheir name, remembers to ask about Aunt Betty, and acts like they truly enjoy seeing them again ... You can bet they'll be back the third time.
Residual Marketing Strategies keep your buyers coming back, time after time.
Residual Marketing Strategies-Keep Them Coming Back to Their Hometown
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Dog owners can take all possible measures to care for their pets in the best way that they can, but the truth is some dogs ' health concerns are simply genetic. Some illnesses that are quite common to the Golden Retriever breed are hip or elbow dysplasia and arthritis. Here are a few things to look out for as well as some preventive tips to keep your Golden retriever as healthy as possible.
Hip/Elbow Dysplasia
Dysplasia is a crippling disease that causes your dogs ' hip or elbow bones to deteriorate. Because of this, an uneven fit with the hip or elbow bone and socket develops. Eventually, this can lead to degenerative joint diseases that will cause your Retriever discomfort.
The good thing is that hip or elbow dysplasia can be detected quite early. At four months,you can have your Golden Retriever tested for the disease through an x-ray. Fortunately in some cases, it is even possible that Golden Retrievers grow out of this disease.
Arthritis
Arthritis affects dog the same way it affects humans. This disease can cause extreme discomfort your Retriever that can make movement difficult. Treatment can be done through injecting pain relievers and medication. Warm baths are also known to relieve discomfort when it comes to aching joints.
Hypothyroidism
Hypothyroidism is a skin disease that is caused by lowered levels of thyroid hormones. A common side effect of this disease includes hair loss. The good news is that this disease is very treatable, hormone replacement therapy thanks to.
Canine Von Willebrand's Disease
Thoughthis disease has quite a rare occurrence rate, it is still known to affect Retrievers. Its effects are quite similar to what happens when people suffer from hemophilia which impairs the body's ability to control bleeding and clots. Though there are no known treatments for this disease, various preventive measures can be taken.
Other health issues involving Golden Retrievers include cancer and epilepsy. To help avoid these diseases, make sure that you acquire your dog from a reputable breeder. Before having your dog mate with another dog, have that dog tested for any diseases. Ensure that your dog maintains a healthy diet and gets enough exercise. Last but not the least; make sure that your dog gets regular check-ups.
Health Concerns in a Golden RetrieverFrom decades together hair gel is very effective anti-bacterial & fungal element that protects hair from infections that may catch hold due to external environmental conditions. Scratching causes dandruff due to loosening of the roots,then alternately alopecia, the use of Aloe Vera permanently will make your hair shine very bright.
Coconut oil
It is amongst the traditionally used hair oil, which is the best tonic to address hair loss and baldness, similar to coconut oil, olives, lavender and castor oils are also the most effective energizers which completely nourish hair and make them appear smoother and healthier. Hair loss will be completely under tab with the usage of these powerful oils, with healthy strands that appear great.
Let's find it in your kitchen; it has been observed that finely prepared paste of cooked black gram dal and "fenugreek" has been the most productive treatment which serves as the hair loss treatment.
Also, almond oil has been the most effective and fast acting hair losscure that works intensely by improving the quality of hair and controlling losing out of strands from the roots.
Rub onion on patches two times in a day later, when the area is red, apply honey. This process will gradually turn dead cells active in those areas that are the results of patches. This is a very easy to follow and effective remedies against baldness hair loss.
"Fenugreek" seeds are also worth being the effective hair loss baldness remedy. The bitter seeds have got additional properties of being a healthy element which works for reducing hair loss. The nutrients make it the super solution that comprehensively nourishes hair from all aspects.
Hair Loss Baldness Natural Remedies
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Growing herbs in pots is as easy if not easier than growing herbs directly into the ground. Culinary and medicinal herbs are the best herbs to grow in pots and for obvious reasons as plants grown in pots are transportable and very easy to access when you need them. The great part about growing your herbs in containers too is that you do not have to be experienced at gardening and to be quite frank this method is the best in my opinion for the beginner gardener.
In this article, I will talk about some common herbs that are ideal for growing in pots indoors or outdoors whether. A key point to keep in mind is to always be familiar with the herbs you are growing so that you can care for them the way they need to be cared for. A simple method to ensure that this happens is toalways follow the care instructions for your plant tag and make sure they are getting the required amount of water, soil, sun and or shade so that it can thrive and reach its full growth potential that is intended for your plant type.
The first kind of herbs that we will talk about is medicinal herbs. These are herbs that have been used for many, many years to treat different types of ailments. Medicinal herbs too versatile and can be used for culinary and aromatic purposes as well.
Lavender-This is a perennial plant and is traditionally used to calm the stressed. The scent of lavender has been used in aromatherapy to relax individuals that are feeling stressed, tense and anxious. The flowers and foliage of the lavender plant are used to make tea and has the same relaxingeffect as the oil from the lavender plant. Other benefits of lavender are its known use as an antibacterial agent, also for its relief of pain, hair loss, and depression; this plant can also be used as a insect WinSafe XP.
Dandelion-This is a perennial plant that deserves to grow in a pot all by itself due to the fact that it needs lots of space for its roots as the root of dandelion is what is typically used for medicinal purposes. Dandelion root is known and used to purify the liver and blood. Furthermore, it promotes healthy digestion and lowers high blood pressure. Overall, dandelion is a great super food containing lots of essential vitamins and minerals that your body requires. The leaves of this plant can also be interchangeable and used in salads.
Echinacea-This is aperennial medicinal plant that is commonly used to build a week immune system or to maintain a balanced system. The herb is particularly taken just before the seasons change so that you can be protected and not come down with colds. Some other benefits of Echinacea is that it aids in fighting infections and is food to use to fight respiratory infections. The leaves of the plant Echinacea can be used to make hot tea.
Parsley-Is a primary plant used as a culinary herb but is also interchangeable and can be used as a medicinal herb as well. In the culinary field, this herb is traditionally used in soups and salads enhancing the tastes of these foods in remarkable ways. In the area the root medicinal, seeds and leaves have been used in the treatment of urinary tract infections,gastrointestinal disorders and menstrual disorders.
Oregano-Oregano is primarily used for culinary purposes but is a very potent medicinal herb as well. This herb is used to season stews, sea foods, soups, meats and vegetables. It is used Medicinally for indigestion, menstrual disorders, infections, headaches, urinary disorders and colds.
The bottom line is herbs are beneficial to us all in so many ways; they were place on the planet for us to enjoy and heal ourselves with. So, if you have interest in growing herbs, start off with just a few herbs growing of interest in pots and see how much joy and the abundance of benefits you will receive form them.
Growing Medicinal & Culinary Herbs in PotsOrganic shampoo and other organic beauty products contain all natural herbs and minerals made from the earth. On the other hand products that are not made from organic products contain Contains. Contains are synthetic man made chemicals that are found in a lot of the personal care and other products. These synthetic chemicals are important because of the effects that they have on our health.
These chemicals have potential toxic effects to the developing endocrine and reproductive systems. They can be found in household products, children's toys, stabilizers in cosmetics and personal care products. This includes shampoo. People are exposed to these chemicals through ingestion, dermal, and inhalation transfer.
Harmful Chemicals Not Found in Organic ShampooHair is the essence of the reflection of who we are. Have our hair disappear then we tend to shy away from crowds, have a full crop then we feel good about ourselves and want to be noticed. I will attempt to identify what this means to people and how it affects their personality and health concerns. When hair loss becomes an issue with a person, I will attempt to identify remedies that may work to re-establish their hair and to try to get back the luster that once was.
What is hair?
Hair is good source of stem cells; perfect hair is in the genes. Long hair is much more likely to be cosmetically damaged than short hair. Obviously this is because there is a lot more of it to take care of and a lot more territory to cover. Power and prestige plays a role but lets face, your hair is definitely going to be prematurely gray. The substance on our head is composed of keratin and related proteins and we have to make sure that we keep ourselves nutritionally healthy or else we will feel the effects with a vengeance.
Having a full head of prestige is the pride of many men and losing that piece of our body can affect the way we look, the way we dress and the way we think about ourselves. For many people, losing their key to power and prestige is a frustrating experience because it seems we can't do a thing about it. You can accept it as part of nature or you can do something about it.
Coping with hair loss can be traumatic sometimes. We'll look at what causes this in the first place and how to deal with the psychological fallout that often accompanies it.
It is normal hair transplant surgery and harmful chemicals won't restore your hair.
Many people spend a lot of money trying to rejuvenate their hair short of a magic remedy.
The ultimate hair loss treatment does not involve surgery. Depending on the reason a proper treatment plan can be implemented and hair grown back naturally. Believe it or not there are remedies if properly used can get us back to where we were.
Hair loss affects 40% of men under 35 and one of the remedies is the use of Rogaine, also known as Monoxide. Rogaine has only limited effectiveness mostly due to slow growth.
There are also a variety of surgical remedies available for a price. Of course there are hair regrowth remedies that you can buy, some over the counter and some being only available on prescription. You can use natural regrowth remedies to save your hair.
Information about these natural remedies can be accessed through online digital books.
Hair loss is clearly stressful to those that suffer from it and is a widely covered topic on the net. Remedies offer hope to people that want solutions to their situation Other natural type treatment plans contain herbs like Saw Palmetto to help eliminate DHT are also available.
There is no simple answer to this problem of the ages. This article is aimed at giving you the best all round advice when searching for hair regrowth treatment plan.
A treatment plan for females is no different than of men. There are treatments for men and women that many say works wonders. Male and female treatment plans depends on a diagnosis from your doctor as to the source of the problem. Each hair regrowth plan has its advantages and disadvantages.
Talking with your doctor remains the best way to learn which treatment would be best for you.
So I have touched on the subject of what hair means to people, how people feel about hair loss and some remedies to be aware of. Now a basic plan has to be formulated on what you intend to do about it. There are some natural remedies that might interest you and are the least expensive route to go.
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Hi, I am Naz, 36 years old, mom of two munchkins: Johan 8, Johanna 4. I live in Penang, Malaysia. My cycling activities started 3 months ago when I ditched my car and got a cool 21 speed mountain bike instead. Everyday, I ride on average 20 km (not in one shot) on busy roads in Penang. Mostly to get to work, run errands and send the kids to school. So, my fitness level reached a plateau when I realized my daily cycling did not even made me sweat anymore. My friend Jijan suggested I started cycling the inclines, I tried the hills at USM, boy, don't they make you sweat!
However, I am still clueless about how to use the gear system properly and have been trying to find an expert who can guide me. I chanced upon a web site (this site) about Pangkor island ran by Peter van der Lans, who has been cycling extensively across Asia for the last eight years. I contacted him and he was more than willing to help whenever I have the chance to get to his base in Sitiawan.
Finally, I managed to get away for three days. It was time for my Pangkor cycling adventure. I cycled from my home to Penang jetty at the crack of the dawn (17 km), took me 50 mins. Then, went on the ferry, then went to the Butterworth bus station, when I encountered my first hiccup. The ticket seller did not allow me to buy the bus ticket until I talked to the bus driver whether I could take the bike on board. Hrmmpph! I persisted, saying if I could not take the bike, I would leave it there and then and still got on the bus! So, I got my ticket to Sitiawan. Very cheap-RM (about 12.50 one way.00).
When the bus arrived, I let everyone on board first before talking to the driver, he was clearly not happy I wanted to stow the bike in his cargo space, saying there would be no space for other people luggage. Oh come on, there were hardly three bags under that bus. I ignored him, and even though had to remove the front wheel (another first - luckily my front wheel had an easy to remove latch), I managed to squeeze the bike in.
Three hours journey, arrived around noon and Peter was waiting. We planned to cycle to Lumut the next day (10 km), then take a ferry to Pangkor. Subsequently, took a round trip tour around the island on bike. Supposed to be only 17 km but what a trip it would be! Nevertheless, I was ready for my Pangkor cycling adventure and I would learn to use my bicycle in a more proper way.
It was a balmy day but I liked it because extensive heat would sap my energy faster. I loved the boat ride, it's been a while since I took a proper holiday. As soon As we reached the island, we wasted no time hitting the road. Peter showed me the basic principle on how the gear system worked. It did not take much time for me to get the hang of it. It was like driving a car, cars only had 5 speed mostly but the bike definitely had more (even though I hardly used the biggest ones because we aim for distance and not speed).
Our first stop was the old Dutch fortress. Took some pictures. I'd seen it on tourist guide book before and quite happy fsdfsdf there. Then we visited the Tiger of Pangkor where Peter told me the legend behind theetched words on the rock. Interesting story. It was ironic to foreigner was guiding a local (Peter is Dutch, by the way).
We took a ride into Pasir Bogak leisure, a popular beach. We went on a Tuesday and there was hardly any soul around. Very quiet and serene. Hmm, I should recommend Tuesdays for a great Pangkor cycling adventure! * grin *. Next stop would be Teluk Nipah, now, this is when hard work was about to start.
Whoa, the first challenge, but I made it! It was a steep hill, but the reward at the end was a fantastic view of the sea. I gasped in short breaths; I cringed at the thought that this was only the starter. The main course would deter even the most seasoned of cyclists, inclines of up to 20%!
When we sailed down through Teluk Nipah (Peter cautioning me touse the brakes carefully), I was pretty wasted already. However, we stopped at one of the chalets and refreshed ourselves with drinks. I declined lunch because I know a full stomach would only kill me if I were to attempt the monstrous hill after the airport at Teluk Dalam.
We did not straight away cycle on, but went to the beach for a swim instead. I really missed the sea. I hadn't dived for almost two years and the need to do so was enormous. Did I mention that I am a scuba diver too? It was Peter's favorite beach. I could understand why. Very nice and clean. A bay with gentle slope but we had freak waves that day, I was thrown several times to the beach and came up with hippy hair full of sand. What a blast!
The swim definitely invigorated me. I had extra energy, now I felt I could do anything. Bring it on, Pangkor hills!
After several small ups and downs of the road, we reached the airport at Teluk Dalam, there was abandoned resort there, complete with a floating restaurant. Then I saw the Everest. My oh my, it was intimidating.
First challenge was the steepest ever. I pushed on, using the smallest gear, did not dare to look up, just looked down on the road and pedaled. Left and right, left and right. "Find the rhythm", Peter told me.
However, I had to stop because I wanted to conserve my energy. We rested for a while to catch our breaths. I was sweating buckets. I looked down and saw the path I took. Never in my dreams had I thought I would be able to do that but I did it. We stopped two more times before the road started to go downhill. It's a very treacherous route. There were U-bend turns, making the use of brakes and balance really necessary.
Peter was really impressed with my achievement. He said he saw my determination and most of it was not just pure physical strength also internal strength "Cycling is mostly mental", he said. I managed to do it because I wanted to. The feel was exhilarating, I was in ecstasy.
We arrived at Pangkor town around 3 pm. We stopped at Mr. Beh's dried seafood (great ikan bilis!) shop to buy some for my mother. The family is a good friend of Peter's. The family is a good friend of Peter's. Mrs. Beh was having lunch and invited us to join them.
We tucked in happily. What a day. I knew I would pay for my exertion that night. Never in my whole life I have been so tired.
We took the 4 pm boat back to Lumut. Another 10 km back to Sitiawan. In total we did 42 km that day. I know what I had to do when I got to Penang. I will train more at the hills at USM and be ready to take Pangkor hills clockwise (even more difficult) next time.
Pangkor Cycling Adventure
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